Most women will not feel "in the mood" if they don't feel relaxed.
Why is this? Well, unlike a lot of men, women tend to struggle with dozens of things in their heads at once. They are constantly thinking and worrying about something. Men are thinking about a lot of things as well, but they are much better at shutting it off when it comes to sex. The majority of women are not good at this. For her to get in the mood for sexual activity, this internal monologue needs to be shut down, and when men do the right things to help shut this down, women feel that they are going the extra mile to get them in the mood
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